Tema: Kelios K
Autorius: Paulius
Data: 2011-03-01 09:47:49
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<DIV><FONT size=2 face=Arial><SPAN 
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'><SPAN 
class=UIStory_Message>Nerealiai pagiriotas vyras, nordamas isisukti nuo darbo, 
nueina  poliklinik.<BR>Akyse alia, galv skauda...<BR>Nestengdamas 
perskaityti ura ant duru, rplioja  ginekologo kabinet.<BR>Ten sdi 
nerealiai pagiriotas ginekologas.<SPAN 
class=Apple-converted-space>&nbsp;</SPAN><BR>Ginekologas tik pavelgia  mogna 
ir sako:<BR><SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" class=text_exposed_show>- Oi, tai js 
nias...<BR>mognas apala ir ibga. Parjs namo, usipuola mon:<BR>- Tai 
vis tavo bajeriai: "A ant viraus, a ant viraus..."!!!<BR>*****<BR>- 
Brangusis, man akinius nusiimti, ar palikti?<BR>- Nusiimk, mieloji.<BR>- O 
palaidine - nusivilkti?<BR>- Nusivilk, mieloji?<BR>- O sijona?<BR>- Nusivilk, 
mieloji.<BR>- O liemenele?<BR>- Nusiimk, brangioji.<BR>- O kelnaites?<BR>- 
Nusivilk, mieloji.<BR>- O "tampaksa"?<BR>- Nu nachui! Nuo to ir reikejo 
pradeti!...<BR>*****<BR>Po sekso:<BR>- Mieloji, ar tu noretum kada nors buti 
vyru?<BR>Ji:<BR>- Ne, o tu?...<BR>*****<BR>Moters mastymas:<BR>Nujau pirkti 
grietins. Grietins neradau, tai nusipirkau tuo akims ir sijon...<SPAN 
class=Apple-converted-space>&nbsp;</SPAN><BR>*****<BR> Atsimink, snau, visam 
gyvenimui  moterys visikai bejgs bna tik tada, kai joms neidivs nag 
lakas.....</SPAN></SPAN></H3></SPAN></SPAN></SPAN></SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT size=2 face=Arial><SPAN 
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<DIV><FONT size=2 face=Arial><SPAN 
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class=Apple-style-span>Nukrito lektuvas i dziungles... Gyva liko tik 
stiuardese.Ciabuviai ja padulkino netingedami keleta dienu ir atidave vadui-kaip 
grobi....<BR>Po savaites vadas susikviecia visa genti:<BR>-Gentie!!!! Ar mes 
verkem,kai kesdavom bado dienas?<BR>-Neeee,vad<SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" 
class=text_exposed_show>e!!!!<BR>Gentie!!!! Ar mes verkem,kai drambliu kaimene 
mums kojas numinde?<BR>- Neeeee,vade!!!!<BR>-Kodel mes verkiam dabar,kai tik 
myzt uzsimanom? )))))</SPAN></SPAN></SPAN></FONT></DIV>
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data-ft='{"type":"name"}'><SPAN class=Apple-converted-space>&nbsp;<SPAN 
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'><SPAN 
class=UIStory_Message>Jis buvo tikras nevyklis. Visur. Sekse taip pat. Netgi 
kai paskambino "Seksas<BR>telefonu", malonus gilus balsas jam atsak:<BR>- Ne 
iandien, mielasis. Man skauda aus...<SPAN 
class=Apple-converted-space>&nbsp;</SPAN><BR>*****<BR>Pas suvalkiet ujo 
kaimynas. Sako:<BR><SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" class=text_exposed_show>- 
Klausyk, gal galtum paskolinti 100 lit? Po savaits grinsiu.<BR>- Be 
problem. Vat tik griu i Paryiaus ir paskolinsiu.<BR>- Tu ruoiesi vaiuoti 
 Pranczij?<BR>- Nei minties tokios neturjau!...<BR>*****<BR>Ginijasi 
vokietis, amerikonas ir rusas, kas geriau imokys kat sti garstyias. Vokietis 
griebia, praiodo ir suveria garstyias  nasrus.<BR>- Tai prievarta! - 
protestuoja amerikonas ir ruselis.<BR>Amerikonas deda garstyias tarp dviej 
deros gabal ir irgi visk sueria.<BR>- Tai apgaul! - nesutinka vokietis su 
rusu.<BR>Ruso eil.Jis iumpa kat ir pisa jai po uodega aukt garstyi. i, 
beprotikai kniaukdama, ima laiyti.<BR>- Va taip, - sako rusas -mokinkites, 
savanorikai ir netgi su daina....<BR>*****<BR>Teisjas kaltinamajam:<BR>- U k 
js sumute kaimyn?<BR>- Todl, kad jis slapiomis savo bute laik 
vitas.<BR>- Bet juk dl to nebtina pulti kumiais.<BR>- Kaip tai ne? A pus 
met gydiausi pas psichiatr vien dl to, kad kas ryt girdjau, kaip gieda 
gaidys. O, pasirodo, jis i tikro giedojo...</SPAN></SPAN></H3>
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'><SPAN 
class=UIStory_Message>Vienas vokietis prarado darb. Paalpa baigsi, draugai 
pinig skolinti nenori... Vargas jau susiruo parduoti but... Prajo mnuo, 
ir staiga jis netiktinai praturtjo: nusipirko nam miesto centre, nauj 
main, vil... Draugai klausinja:<BR>- Hansai, kur tu gavai tiek pinig?<BR>- 
Na, tiesiog daviau skelbim  laikrat<SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" 
class=text_exposed_show>...<BR>- Kok?<BR>- Paprast: "A vargas turkas, labai 
noriu grti  tvyn, bet neturiu pinig" ....<BR>*****<BR>Grta vyras namo i 
darbo. Ant stalo ratelis:<BR>"Mielasis, a ijau pas draug. Vakarien ant 
virykls. Mekers kampe. Jei lydeka kainuos daugiau kaip 5 litai - nupirk 
eeri..."<BR>*****<BR>Pareina girtas vyras namo ir 
aukia:<BR>-Parjau!!!!<BR>Niekas neatsako.<BR>-Grau!!!<BR>Ramu. Nueina  
virtuv paima vaz ir meta ant ems. Tyla. Eina  salon paima vaz ir meta  
sien.<BR>Tylu. Greitai bga  miegamaj pagriebia televizori ir meta pro 
lang.Tyla.<BR>-Kaip zajabys, kad gyveni vienas ....<BR>*****</SPAN></SPAN></H3>
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<H3 
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'><SPAN 
class=UIStory_Message>Prie geriausio viesbucio uzsienio turistas klausia 
merginos:<BR>- Panele, jus kalbate angliskai?<BR>- Taip, truputi.<BR>- Kiek 
truputi?<BR>- 200 doleriu....<BR><SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" 
class=text_exposed_show>...*****<BR>Teisme:<BR>- Tai va gerbiamas teisjau, 
utvr man keli siauroj gatvelj ir sako:<BR>- "Nusiimk palt ir 
kepur!"<BR>Na, a ir nusimiau nuo vieno palt, nuo kito 
kepur...<BR>*****<BR>Girdjau, kad norint jog mergina pajust orgazma, reikia 
laiyti aplink ten, kur ji daro sysiuk, tik niekaip nesuprantu, ar laiyti tik 
aplink klozeto dangt, ar aplink vis tlik...</SPAN></SPAN></H3>
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class=UIStory_Message><SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" 
class=text_exposed_show><SPAN 
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class=UIStory_Message><SPAN style="DISPLAY: inline" 
class=text_exposed_show>Gruzinas, rusas ir pranczas kalba apie 
moteris.<BR>Pranczas sako: Moteris kaip daina, klausytum ir klausytum.<BR>Rusas 
sako : Moteris kaip ploktel, paklausai ir imeti.<BR>Gruzinas: na kam imesti, 
paklausai apverti ir vl klausai....<BR>*****<BR>Uraas ant baikerio nugaros: 
"Jeigu tu dabar tai skaitai, reikia a pameiau savo bob"....<BR>*****<BR>- 
Kaip mane jau upiso tie buratinai, - tar tt Karlas, maudamas ant kirvio 
prezervatyv...<BR>*****<BR>Atjo Petriukas pas mama ir klausia:<BR>- Kas yra 
transvestitas?<BR>- Neinau. Nueik paklausti dds 
Jolantos....</SPAN></SPAN></H3>
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class=text_exposed_show><SPAN 
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'><SPAN 
class=UIStory_Message>Skrenda lektuvas.. Pirmas pilotas pasikviecia stiuardese 
ir sako:<BR>-Prasti musu popieriai,nuramink keleivius...<BR>Stiuardese iseina i 
salonair:<BR>-Gerbiami keleiviai,jei as nusiimsiu bliuskute,nukris desinysis 
sparnas...<BR>Visi priestarauja,tik senis gruzinas:-Oi,renkis ,renkis..<BR><SPAN 
style="DISPLAY: inline" class=text_exposed_show>Nusirengia ir sparnas 
nukrenta<BR>-Gerbiami keleiviai,jei nusimauciau sijona-nukristu kairysis 
sparnas.<BR>Visi priestarauja,tik senis gruzinas:-Oi,renkis renkis!!!<SPAN 
class=Apple-converted-space>&nbsp;</SPAN><BR>Nusirengia,sparnas nukrenta ir 
visas lektuvas-uuuuzt 
zemen...<BR><SPAN>----------------------------------------</SPAN><WBR></H3>
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class=UIIntentionalStory_Message 
data-ft='{"type":"msg"}'>----------------------------- is po nuolauzu issliauzia 
gruzinas,ziuri i jau issiropstuse stiuardese ir sako;<BR>- Pati kurva ir 
juokeliai tavo kurviski... ))))))))))))))))</H3>
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